In Uncertain Times

Photo by Color Crescent on Unsplash

I don’t care for uncertainty. I want to know everything is going to be okay. But living as a human on planet Earth is full of uncertainty. Impermanence is also a part of this existence. And that’s the good news because this confusing and troubling time will pass.

Though there is comfort in impermanence, there is also sadness. We have lost loved ones, pets, jobs and intangible things like trust. Impermanence also clears the way for new things to come into our lives as well as the passing of these trying times. And maybe it’s in the midst of these trying times something new can be born because in these moments of uncertainty, possibility lives.

What is possible in this particular moment when we can’t pretend to know what will happen? I don’t like the way it feels, but that’s only because I want certainty. What happens if I let go of wanting things to turn out a certain way? I would have to try it to find out. The thing is I don’t  I can. But if I don’t let go of this moment, how can I live the next one? I see how people can get stuck.

There have been times when I’ve stepped out onto the path that wasn’t there. I’ve walked into the darkness and trusted. But this time feels different. This time I feel the ending more than I feel the possibility. This time I feel the next step is into grief and not the next adventure. And maybe that’s exactly where I need to be. Maybe it’s where we all need to be.

I’m not saying there is no joy to be found in this place, but we need to feel the pain of endings in order to also feel the joy of possibility that will lead us to what is next. Perhaps grief is the path.

And I’m not saying this is the end of everything, but there are many endings right now on this planet and we’ve tried to ignore them. We’ve been unsuccessful in doing so if our general malaise is any indication…if this virus is any indication. A friend said something about this. Perhaps we’re getting sick because we are already sick…sick and tired, exhausted by all that is going on and by the uncertainty of it all.

I don’t like uncertainty. But what is certain is the impermanence of everything on this physical plane and probably beyond until you get to the very ground of being that sustains all. She is the womb of possibility. Within Her, uncertainty lives. She gives birth to the light that becomes everything and is ever changing. She is always there. In the changing seasons, in the changing times, in the changing relationships, in the changing we realize what is real.

All is changing now and has always been. Some changes feel scary, but that’s because we don’t like the uncertainty. If we can learn to let go and flow with Her, maybe we’ll find ourselves finally in the calm center that was always in our beating hearts. Not easy to do sometimes, especially in moments like these. When you’re afraid, you feel as though you can’t breathe. Let’s take a collective breath and know Her love is the air we breathe with the wings of this gift called life.